enough said…………….

So which is it? Really? With so many people today  accusing the local church of failure to reach them….. is it really the local church?

“The bible says that He takes us and He breaks us and He takes all the old junk that we used to carry around and then He then puts us back together and fills us with His life, His Holy Spirit, His love, His dreams, His goals, His desires, and then He turns us loose and feeds us to a sea of humanity that’s in need of the Gospel!  The question I ask you today is will you take part in this mission or will you quit and ring the bell when it gets tough and almost unbearable?  Will you stay with it, will you persevere, when others around you are dropping out of the race and screaming for you to do the same, will you listen to them or will you listen to that still small voice inside your heart that says “My yoke is easy and my burden is light”.  His grace is sufficient for any task or mission that stands in your way.  He says to us all, keep going, don’t quit; the world needs the message that’s alive in your heart!”

-Tom

-Tom

Strange things can happen to small groups when they step outside of our normal surroundings. Jesus and his small group had their first recorded gathering in Mark 1 and it was in a strange place. They met in one of the most public venues they could find: The Synagogue. Because of meeting in this public place, Jesus encountered an exciting ministry opportunity.

Jesus’ small group first met in this public place and it attracted attention. It’s doubtful that Jesus and his group would have found an exciting ministry opportunity if they were meeting in a home or in a back room of the Synagogue (Sunday school class).  Yet because they met in plain view of the public, they encountered an opportunity to minister to an individual in great need.  The result:  Jesus’ reputation exploded.

What is your small group doing to have an exploding reputation in the community? Are you meeting safely inside a home or church building, insulated from the rest of the world? Or are you doing life together in public, so that evangelistic ministry opportunities can be seized? Does your small group look look like Jesus’ small group, or does it look like something different?  I’m just asking.

They went to Capernaum, and when the Sabbath came, Jesus went into the synagogue and began to teach. The people were amazed at his teaching, because he taught them as one who had authority, not as the teachers of the law. Just then a man in their synagogue who was possessed by an evil spirit cried out, “What do you want with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are–the Holy One of God!”
“Be quiet!” said Jesus sternly. “Come out of him!” The evil spirit shook the man violently and came out of him with a shriek.
The people were all so amazed that they asked each other, “What is this? A new teaching–and with authority! He even gives orders to evil spirits and they obey him.” News about him spread quickly over the whole region of Galilee.

~Mark 1:21-28 (NIV)

-Tom

A lot of couples have communication problems. Their conversations center around schedules or kids or “how was work?” They have a difficult time talking with one another. When they were dating, they’d stay up late and talk and laugh and dream, but now they only talk when they fight. We had communication issues.

There are so many couples that have problems in their marriage because of finances. They’ve mismanaged their money. They’ve put themselves in debt. They’ve made irresponsible decisions. Sometimes it has nothing to do with bad decisions and everything to do with a small salary and a growing family. We had so many problems in our marriage that revolved around money…not enough of it…accumulating debt…not being on the same page. Lots of problems.

Some couples have priority issues. They fail to prioritize one another. They have no problem working their schedule around business meetings and girls night out and fantasy football and Saturday morning soccer and dinner with friends and PTO meetings…but they fail to prioritize their most important earthy relationship…their spouse. We blew it in this area. We gave so many people, so many events, so many expectations priority over the other.

We talk to couples that have difficulty resolving conflict. They argue about the same things week after week, month after month, year after year. One spouse is passive aggressive while the other is a hot head and loses their temper. One spouse is aggressive and chases while the other is an avoider and tries to sweep issues under the carpet. We did a horrible job at resolving conflict.

A lot of couples have intimacy issues. Sex is infrequent. The withholding of sex is used as punishment. Husbands pursue their wives only when they want sex. Sex is seen only as a physical act and not an emotional and spiritual gift. We had so many arguments that revolved around our lack of understanding of one another in the area of intimacy.

Even with all of these issues, they weren’t the source of our marital problems. They probably aren’t the source of yours either.

More than communication; more than finances; more than priorities; more than conflict resolution; even more than sex:

Your relationship with God will affect your relationship with your spouse more than ANYTHING else.

You can try to communicate better…for a while. You can try to not argue about money and debt and who’s paying what bill..for a while. You can do your best to make your wife a priority…for a while. You can read a self-help book on conflict resolution and argue more effectively…for a while. You can overcome your sexual frustrations…for a while.

What we have realized in our own life is that when our personal relationship with God is sucking wind…so does our marriage. We have spent so much time and energy trying to fix all of these things in our marriage…when more than anything else, our relationship with God sets the tone and direction for every single area of our marriage.

It’s been nothing short of supernatural, and we always take the opportunity to share our story. With that said, I couldn’t resist sending David Foster’s post today concerning “normal” marriages….and what today’s normal truly looks like.

-Tom

I think “normal” is way overrated when you understand that most people you meet have settled for a life far below what they could have.

This is never more true than when you think about marriage.  Normal marriage in America means the following:

• Miserable and stuck, but not sure why.
• Hardly talking, except to argue.
• Crushing debt, with no plan to get out.
• Little sex, and even the little they have is not fulfilling.
• Temptation to stray, flirting with strangers.
• Stress at work, brought home.
• Stress at home, brought to work.
• A mild displeasure with life, but not enough energy to do anything about it.

So I don’t want “normal” for my marriage.  I want an above normal marriage.

• One where we love each other and talk.
• One where we enjoy being together.
• We are best friends.
• We praise and lift each other up.
• Together we create something more from our lives that we could have ever enjoyed or created alone.

I dare you to refuse to accept a “normal” marriage.  Listen, no one gets married to a boring person not having fun, but most people wind up there.  If you refuse to accept normal and then pursue an extraordinary relationship, you just might end up with it.

-Tom

DEFAULT MODE
 
It was Martin Luther who insightfully suggested that “religion” is the default mode of the human heart.
I’ve unfortunately found this to be quite true. Unless I tell my heart to deliberately do something different, I often drift toward using religion to reach God.
Tim Keller wrote a brilliant piece on this in The Prodigal God . He said…
“Even after you are converted by the gospel your heart will go back to operating on other principles unless you deliberately, repeatedly set it to gospel-mode.
We habitually and instinctively look to other things besides God and his grace as our justification, hope, significance, and security. We believe the gospel at one level, but at deeper levels we do not. Human approval, professional success, power and influence, family and clan identity-all those things serve as our heart’s “functional trust” rather than what Christ has done, and as a result, we continue to be driven to a great degree by fear, anger, and a lack of self-control.
This is why almost each morning I have to reset my mind. I have to intentionally set my mind on the Gospel and the grace it provides. Losing my religion is tougher than I ever thought.

Paul’s final words were addressed to Timothy, a pastoral candidate. Like many ministerial plebes, Timothy had questioned this strange choice of occupation. After all, his mentor had more scars than friends, more jail time than spare time. And because Paul’s battles were from both sides of the church door, Timothy must have wondered, “How can anyone shepherd unruly sheep and menacing wolves at the same time?”

The apostle didn’t leave his protégé wondering for long. Paul’s exhortation has become his famous last words:

• Be faithful in your duties. (2im 1.8)
• Hold on to sound doctrine. (2Tim 1.13)
• Guard what you say and do. (2Tim 2.22-24)
• Be willing to suffer persecution for the gospel. (2Tim 3.12)
• Work hard at preaching the Word. (2Tim 4.1-2)

These were Paul’s non-negotiable pastoral priorities. That’s why he could say, “I’ve fought the good fight, I’ve finished the course, I’ve kept the faith…”

And, as a result, Paul – and countless others like him – heard another set of famous last words: “Well done, thou good and faithful servant… enter into the joy of your master.”

Is that your goal, too?

-Tom

The last two days in south-central Kansas have been stormy wet! The sound of rain, that usually really makes me relaxed, has been replaced by pounding thunder, winds and rain. All of this reminds me of how my daily life can be. It can be sedate and routine, cruising if you will. In those times, I feel God is giving me such peace, beyond my own understanding. These days (and nights) allow me to focus on God in a different way. In a way that is so different than the days of life’s storms. See Mark 4:17

Like most people who call themselves “Christians”, I too rely (more like lean) on God during the loud, wet and troubled days. Sometimes those days consume me and all the thing around me, including my family. But over the last year, the troubled days have been balanced, almost canceled, by God’s peace, grace and unfailing love that I’ve seen in the quiet of the “cruising” days of life.

How do you balance your days of “cruising” verses the “stormy” days?

-Tom